INV3RT3R series: what if you had to do manual labor for the rest of your life and let farmers run Google, facebook and all the startup nations?
I would be more than glad to wake up in a world where computers aren’t somehow tied to everything we do, predicting everything we say, doing everything we do:
I know automated water, electric and remote systems shed new lights when it comes to run and maintain a proper farm but my point here is how quickly farmers would adjust to Excel or mails contrary to what we — in this scenario, “puss#es from downtown”… — would certainly to do the other way around: totes fuck it up. MBA: 0. Farming stuff: 150!
Seriously, ask anyone in Silicon Valley, from the junior dev ops to the VP Grandpa: what’s left of our survival instincts?
What brought us here in the first place?
Our love for being in the open, adapting, evolving?
Do we have a positive way out of our screen? Out of this screen? Your child’s tablet?
Showing him a TV is useless and not funny anymore.
Telling him about an old PC is just bad parenting.
Taking him to a derry farm would make him/her kill him/herself and or make him/her run for the hills… and then back to the bedroom again.
We might have game-changing ideas indoors (more on that here) but we are ultimately born to walk, run, jump, make, build, throw, catch, eat, drink, I dunno, not just to connect, share, email, meet, greet, network, fund, fail and fall. I mean we’re meant to fall. That’s just gravity being there.
But never in our evolution cool shit like “Fail please” would be acceptable. Let’s see you fail while being a shepard. Shiiiiiiiiit… where are them sheep now?
“Failure is part of the road to feed, ride and treat a horse”, said Mr. Nobody to Mrs. Never; “After you fall, you’ll get up wiser”. I don’t think so! Method and discipline makes for great farmers.
Get up before sunrise, sleep only after 11PM, no breaks, holiday leave is just a joke — dudes work round the clock, through the weekend, Christmas, Hanukah, Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur — you pick a day, they worked all the way through it.
Pressing 0 buttons!
How many apps have you launched — that actually make a fucking difference — in the meantime?
ZUCKERBERG SUCKS AS SHEPARD
Despite the fact I just wrote “suck as s….” to make it look like Zuck “sucks ass” — one can cultivate working around the machine, ‘ye know, just like you grow tomatoes, you can learn how to become allergic to algorythms — the fact is it also sounds like “success”.
Managing fruits and veggies and pigs and dogs and cats and sheep (that’s not all they do, I’m honestly just converting what I think people from Portuguese farms do, and this should be a solid 5% of the total ‘daily objective’, just guessin’:) would be a no-brainer to whom, if techie f#cks aren’t fit for purpose?
Coders? Nah, they’re too 2015.
CEOs? Nope, they’re just boring.
FARMERS, THE FIRST ENTREPRENEURS
It doesn’t matter you’re TEDTalking like a douche and hitting all marks in terms of business op, strategy, vision, funding, you’re just following steps son.
Zillions before you did what you did just there, only better because they failed waaay less than you’re encouraged to (I think Time plays a huge, if not a decisive role in this equation).
SO AL, YA GOD LOVIN’ COUSIN IMPALIN’ FOREIGNER HATIN’… TAKE GOOGLE FOR A DAY, WILL YA?
There’s about 80% chance Al won’t f#ck everything up. It’s in… autopilot. It’s automated. It’s ‘automoney’.
In Europe or in China though… Al would have to go ‘full manual’.
Will he succeed?
Chances are “yup”, even if he says words like “perrty” or throws out cas conversation like “how y’all been doing today, remember to say ‘Hi below the sky’ to the colored person, now he’s earned it”.
SO MARK OR GARY OR ERIC OR ELON OR BILL OR WHATEVER YOU GUYS ARE CALLING YOURSELVES THESE DAYS, TAKE CARE OF PEOPLE AND ANIMALS FOR A MONTH
So I’ve just switched the rules of the title but this serves to point out Mr. Gates, Mr. Zuck and Mr. Your Next ‘Teenilionaire’ will also be automatically boring: nerd, no social skills, not caring about the community at all (Mr. Gates is a proud philantrophist for what… 10 to 12 years? When was he raining money during the 90s?:).
Quoting the movie Insomnia: “You’re about as mysterious to me as a toilet is to a f#cking plumber”.
And sure they’ll fail. And that’s okay, I guess.
AUTOMATION CANNOT RULE THE NATION
Tech evolves so fast it changes the way we speak. It manipulates how we feel.
Tomatoes don’t grow as fast you might think and they’re healthy enough you don’t have to scream. They’ll make you feel okay.
I still prefer the latter version of ourselves.
The one where we actually take charge and don’t let stuff get in the way.
The one we make all the efforts and not the code.
The one we directly and immediately impact the community.
The eco one.
The outdoor one.
Have a good one.
Even if written in code, that’s okay.
You live to see another day where farming is still a thang!
